when confined small spaces either mentally or physically cause one to hold their breath
when another way fails to present itself
when the prescribed medication turns into an addiction and you choose to continue to struggle for your memory each day and live, rather than be held hostage to the drug that’s coursing through your veins and wants you to take your life
when the scale has jumped ten pounds and clothing is too tight
when there’s no bread on the bread aisle even though you may not eat it, it makes you cry for those who do
when the rain falls from the sky full of acid and destroys the evergreens
when officials believe the Black lives don’t matter
when others are starving and we have plenty to share even if the bread shelves are empty
when the innocent are incarcerated without evidence or killed because of the color of one’s skin
heart cries out HELP to the one who resides within – and soon the cry becomes a prayer
and one day the prayer is answered by the one within with a question: What took you so long?
relaxed and assured – I know now – Enough is Enough
Ethel Marie Shamoon Henry, married and Catholic, daughter of two and Situ to one, died age 89 of complications while agonizing over the last pages of her memoir. She couldn’t remember the details upon which she left her home at age 16, mentally or 17, physically? She never understood her life not turning out the way she dreamed – college educated, managing her own business, traveling the globe. Ethel was tired.
She was tired of this story. Tired of her life without the
education she longed for and the places she wanted to live and traveled after
she’d raised her own children, she was just tired!
Her REAL exhaustion came when she decided to prepare her own obituary and thought to herself – dang woman – haven’t you had enough?When will you begin living the life you wanted? Dreamed of? Longed for? Or, have you been all along, but just hadn’t noticed it in full? Give it up! Turn it over! Live this day the way you want – with whom you want – say what you mean – but, DON’T say it mean! Life is short! Remember, your last sunset. Your last words to those closest to you. The last color you saw. The last bird you heard. The last smile you smiled, The last laugh you laughed. The last prayer you uttered. Remember, smile, laugh and move on.
Move on to TODAY! Are you ready? She opened her eyes while lying peacefully in a down covered hammock next to her pond and waterfall oasis, gazed up at the clouds and said – Yes! It’s been a good life! A Full life! I have loved. I have been loved. I’ve colored, created art and captured. I’ve said what I wanted to say, traveled much, walked and hiked often. And I married a man who loved me until my dying breath. I’m ready.
Just then, her eyes closed again, and this time, she had a soft, childlike smile upon her face, the sun was setting in the west with a rainbow of colors like the one she’d seen so many years ago upon Max Patch. As she exhaled her last breath. Finally, Ethel was at peace and rest. – Amen.
Services will be held in the local Catholic Church with On Eagle’s Wings playing as she is escorted to the grave site of her beloved sister, Roxane. All are welcomed to visit now and again. Bring your favorite heart rock and share one with another. Dark chocolate and coffee to be served.
Where does love go when the light goes out? A question he asked once as a young man in his 60’s . He doesn’t remember asking these days. However, the question is a good one and has remained with me. How to answer this? Love is always present within every human being I believe. For some, a place in the dark could also represent a place of silence, loneliness, or the sound of mental chatter grinding away while one wishes for a lover’s embrace.
As a child, I recall needing two doors left wide open, and a nightlight on at all times in order to feel safe enough to close my eyes and attempt to go to sleep. Where was love in this dark twin bed on the third floor of Macon Avenue?